One day down . . .

One day down . . .

One day down . . . . hard to say how many more to go.

So far today no tears have been shed. This alone is a huge accomplishment. Yes, I’m a very emotional person, so when you add a an experience like yesterday into the mix . . . well . . .

For no reason at all, and at the most bizarre moments, tears fell freely yesterday.

They started because of text messages exchanged between friends and family, Facebook comments from friends sharing their experiences or simply just looking at one of my favorite photographs of Jason and I. Those tears made sense.

The trip to the bank, on the other hand, took me by surprise.

Yesterday after leaving the bank, I was driving down the road, a road I travel quite frequently, when all of a sudden they started falling. Within a couple of minutes the tears stopped, although the thoughts about Jason and I carried on.

Jason and I

The best part about my day was when Jason made it to Fort Myers and the text messages were being exchanged more frequently. He was so good about calling or sending me a text message every time he stopped letting me know where he was, how he was doing and how much further he had to go.

Although I knew he was going to be okay on the drive, it’s my nature to worry. So when I got the text that he is now in his parents driveway, the weight on my shoulders, which I didn’t know existed, became lighter.

There were a string of text messages that had me laughing out loud when he started explaining why he couldn’t fall asleep. I could hear him, I could sense the laughter as he was typing the words. The best part about these messages is they appeared right before a board meeting I had to cover last night. Those messages lifted my spirits, giving me the strength to smile and put my emotions on hold for the duration of the meeting.

From that point on I felt my mood change. I felt a little lighter. Jason did it once again and he’s hundreds of miles away. Jason lifted my spirits. With those simple goofy texts he reminded me that we are going to be okay. I still have the love, support and humor of a man . . . I just don’t have him right next to me.

After I returned from my meeting, before going to bed, my breathing and mood returned to its normal state. I talked to Jason. I heard his voice, his reassurance, his love.

I had to share how much of an impact that phone call had on me, so I took a picture of Lucy, my puppy and I, and sent it to Jason. My smile was genuine, big as always, to show Jason we will get through this.

I didn’t cry myself to sleep, like I did that morning after he left.

Before I drifted to sleep on his side of the bed, I remember my thoughts turning from how much I miss him already, to this is only temporary, we will be together soon.

This morning I woke to a text message from Jason sharing his thoughts on the picture I sent, which were followed by more messages and a phone call. Yep, hearing his voice put me on track . . . I already finished a few articles this morning and turned them into my editor.

When you share the kind of love and support that Jason and I share, you can overcome any obstacle you are faced with.

My spirits are high, which I know is giving Jason the positive energy he needs to accomplish our plans and goals.


Here are the two blogs that explain how we got to this point . . .

An extremely hard decision: March 6, 2015 : https://meghan80.wordpress.com/2015/03/06/an-extremely-hard-decision/

 

Flowing freely: March 9, 2015: https://meghan80.wordpress.com/2015/03/09/flowing-freely/

My everything

This morning as Jason gave me a hug goodbye before leaving for work, his love consumed me. I felt it in every bone of my body how much I mean to him.

Although we share the words “I love you,” it’s the tender moments that mean so much more.

Last night as we were eating dinner what Jason suggested blew me away. My older sister and her family, as well as my mom and dad, are driving to Illinois for my cousins wedding this weekend. He said maybe we can meet them along the way.

A moment like this says “I love you.”

This suggestion of course brought an instant smile and an overwhelming feeling of love.

It’s true this man will do anything for me.

This man would drive, I don’t know for how many hours, just so I can see my family and give them all hugs.  I, of course, turned down his suggestion, although it was incredibly sweet.

Jason is my everything.

A few weeks ago Jason sent me a text that has stuck with me. Yes, when I read those words I cried. Good tears of course.

“I love you and live for you.”

Wow. Words like this left me speechless.

Everyday I’m thankful my first true love is back in my life. Everyday I’m thankful I have experienced true, unconditional love. I will be forever grateful to this man for showing me so much, for making me feel so loved.

I have such a caring, dedicated man who makes sure I smile each and everyday. Even when my stubbornness takes over, he still goes above and beyond to break through the barrier to make me smile. 

I love this man so much!

Best message

Sometimes all you need is a text message from a loved one to brighten your day.

I put my car into park and looked at my phone before walking into the office today, something I tend to do every day. The message that appeared on my phone brought me to tears.

Those words filled my heart with so much joy, so much love.

There is no better feeling … to hear what someone thinks about you, really thinks about you.

I’m talking about Jason of course.

His words, those words now saved on my phone, have played through my thoughts for the past few hours, taking away the stress I was feeling when I said goodbye to him this afternoon.

The embrace he gave me before leaving has also stayed with me.  

One of the flaws I have, I stress out way too easy when I know everything will be fine.

My heart is still smiling thinking about his words, almost five hours later.

I will never be able to put into words of just how much this man means to me, what an extraordinary role he has had and continues to have in my life.

It’s amazing how much emotion is still flooding through my body … the happy tears are being held back … only because I am sitting in the break room at work.

He is my rock for sure …